Eggshells and Salt

Today we celebrated my dad's 50th. The morning was a nice start to the celebration, but it wasn't complete without a mini melt/breakdown with tears. I'm an adult. And a baker. I LOVE eggs (okay, so love is a strong word, but I really, really like eggs). I'm learning to cook things that involve ingredients IN ADDITION to eggs. I've had food poisoning before and GI issues since I was little, so cooking food (especially meat) is a little terrifying to me. With that said, I ask A LOT of questions when it comes to cooking and doing so properly. The health and safety and me and my family is very important. Well, long story short, I asked a few questions that one bought I should know the answers to. There were some rather loud reactions, a fast walk to the bathroom and tears. I was frustrated. I was upset. I was trying to do an act of love and it was a rough start. I cried because I wanted to do something special, but mostly, I wanted to do it right (read: perfect). Well, the end result was....well, I'll get there. Also, another lesson I learned was don't cook angry. No one wins.
After I returned to the kitchen and some tense moments of silence filled with the sound of heavy-handed clanking around and closing of cabinet doors, I finally spoke. Saying you're sorry and apologizing, especially when you felt like the other person is more in the wrong, is beyond tough. I felt I was the one hurt the most. I felt like I was owed an apology from the woman who was supposed to love me forever. I felt I was doing the right thing by inquiring about the meat to be cooked.
My mom is not above giving an apology and that's something I truly admire. She's never too big to say the words, "I'm sorry" and can admit she's human (although, she's always Wonder Woman to me)! With a shaky voice, I said I was sorry, how I felt and why I felt that way. She said she was sorry, too. We worked through it by using communication. I know that sounds like a "duh" statement, but think about the world around you and the people in it. When someone speaks to you, do you just hear them, or do you really listen to them-even when disagreeing? Have you ever watched two strangers talking to each other, but not really communicating?
I learned a conflict resolution technique at leadership camp for Pride (my college marching band...go Sooners).  There were 4 steps (although I only remember 3 steps): Name (of person you're talking to), I feel (insert one or two of five basic human emotions). The facts are (state FACTS). What I want from you is (tell 'em what you want!)!
I also overheard teens standing in front of each other saying, "I didn't appreciate it when you..." in the middle of Barnes and Noble last Saturday night after my church service. (I also learned that Barnes and Noble seems to be the hot teen hangout after a movie. Hey-at least they're surrounded by books!)
We said our I'm sorrys, we moved on and we proceeded to make a breakfast for the most important man in my life! But remember how I said I wanted it to be perfect? And NOT to cook angry? Well, I was no longer angry or upset, but it was too late and the snafus already set in: mistiming on preparation, telling him biscuits were on the menu when there were actually no biscuits to be found anywhere in the house, mom accidentally over-salted the hashbrowns, and there were eggshells in my only contribution to my dad's celebration.
At the end, we all laughed about it and said a hearty Happy 50th to my daddy! We told him we did the meal out of love. So glad he didn't take the finished product as a gauge of how much we love and care about him. The thoughts and intentions were there, the execution- not so much. It kind of reminds me of when it comes to worship and The Lord. We want to sing and give our most perfect praises, but He doesn't care how it sounds. He just wants it to come from the heart, like the eggshells and salt.